Despite my (inevitable) frustration, I've had a certain optimism. I don't know why, but I'm not at all upset about this outlook. Maybe I found my cranes, the things that introduce hope into my life; I just wish I knew what they were.
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september 18, 2017//I know I've been slacking, but I'm back now. It's almost like I never left.9/18/2017 How great it is to live in a time where my idols are constantly recognized, appreciated, and prospering.How great it is but, oh, how sad. Sad that "first black person to" is a phrase too common - yet comforting. It's an acknowledgment of how far we've come but also how far we haven't. I can't ignore though how great it feels to know that my children - that all of the children of the next generation - will live in a time where their talents extend beyond what they look like, where they're from, who they love, and beyond their age.
re: /what a world, what a beautiful world/ There's so much that we've accomplished together. Isn't it beautiful -what we've accomplished together?Have you ever felt like you were drowning? Completely surrounded and suffocating and everyone around you is telling you to breathe? It's not at all what I thought living was, and it's not at all how anyone should be forced to live. I hope this... pressure doesn't affect who I am and what I create. My art is so important to me.
Kiara Martinez There is very little to say. What words are even necessary when others are being suppressed - when the world is falling apart but the focus is on denying home to the people I dare say are more American than he'll ever be? I can find little stomach to express myself at a time like this. I'm scared, and I don't know how to help.
this page is becoming bland and the lack of visuals™ is making me sad but let's make next week like picture appreciation or some *expletive*So, I sat in on the Drama I Honors class today...I'm not entirely sure what it is (if you're not picking up on my approach to life yet, I don't know what else I can do to show it), but I'm beginning to finally understand that I am a senior, which is terrifying and awesome and everything in between. I haven't fully accepted it, and I probably won't until I'm being handed my diploma at Northcutt. But watching the class for the 27ish minutes that I did made me feel something. It was amazing seeing them and realizing that I, along with the IB Theatre class, started there. And to realize how far we've come in a short few years is something I'll cherish at the very least for now. Some part of me misses it of course, but the better part of me knows that the experience comes from the progress and we've made a hell of a lot it. I guess, and I say this a lot (on here), I just really *expletive* love them and this and this feeling is something I never want to lose no matter how painful it can be sometimes. That's just how life goes, right?
Now that you're done reading that Extra Long™ (ding) title, we can continue.
So, I love my cast so much!!!!!!!! They're all so cute and fun and funny and we can joke around and still get a lot done and we're all becoming more comfortable with each other and it's all so great <3 For yesterday's rehearsal we did some character analysis/building. We played a modified version of a game where each person takes a turn being interrogated (that sounds so serious) about their character. And not textbook stuff either. The questions were all intended to put the actor in the consciousness of their character; there was no prep time. And through this, I feel as though there was a greater understanding because the actor was creating the backstory for their character, giving meaning to their character's behavior - in the moment. It not only assured me that they knew their script, but they were beginning to get a more holistic idea of who the characters are, You can consider this a late double-post or an early daily post, but regardless I've been thinking. I seem to have gone back and forth with my feelings about my rehearsals mainly because I have gone back and forth with my feelings about my rehearsals - going from absolute and rather overwhelming confidence to absolute (and just as overwhelming) fear. But thing is nothing is perfect, and more importantly nothing has to be. There are good days and bad days and really good days and really bad days, but what matters is that there are days - that we're experiencing and fully invested in every single one of them, no matter the status. I've come to terms with the fact that there will be difficulties, and it is my responsibility to be just as accepting of them as I am with what comes easy.
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